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  • Josh Topf

Punishments: The Real Fun of Fantasy Football

Fantasy football is an extremely popular activity during the NFL season. In fantasy football, normally 8-18 people participate in one league, and before the NFL season begins, league members draft NFL players to be on their team. The better a player does in his NFL game, the more fantasy points he earns. Each week every fantasy team goes head-to-head with another team, and the team that accumulates the most points wins.


At the end of the season, there are playoffs, in which only the top teams have a shot at winning the whole league. While the winner of the league often receives some amount of money, the real fun comes from the person who comes in last place. Many leagues have a punishment set in place for the member who comes in last, and fantasy football punishments are anything but ordinary.

One such punishment, which has been rapidly gaining popularity over the past few years, is the “Milk Mile.” This is the punishment set in place by my league. This punishment is exactly what it seems, based on the name. Whoever is participating in the “Milk Mile” must drink a 12oz cup of milk, then run 400m around a track, and then repeat those steps three more times. By the end, the “Milk Runner” will have ended up drinking 48 oz of milk while running a mile. To make this even more challenging, many people have extra rules or stipulations, such as that the mile must be run in under a certain amount of time or else the entire process has to be repeated. Overall, the “Milk Mile” is an easy-to-set-up and very entertaining punishment for any fantasy football league.


Another punishment that is commonly used with the younger generation is the “social media takeover.” During the social media takeover, the loser must give the winner their login credentials to their social media account. The winner, for 24 hours, can post whatever they want on the loser's account. This punishment varies quite a bit based on the league, as the severity of the punishment is entirely up to the winner who has full control over what gets posted.


The extremely cruel “SAT punishment” is another option. This punishment is more popular among adults, while teenagers who will have to take the SAT eventually aren’t as affected by it. As its name suggests, this punishment entails the loser being required to take the SAT. To avoid this being an easy punishment, and to avoid the loser just turning in a blank sheet, this punishment requires them to achieve a certain score or else they must keep retaking the test. As a result, it can be excruciating for the loser.


Next up is the highly tedious and infrequently used “ Ride to Nowhere.” In this punishment, the loser must ride on the winner's choice of transportation, spend the whole day going to a random place, and then travel all the way back. While many people would think this is easy, it is made much more difficult by the fact that the loser may not use his or her phone or other electronic devices during it, except for a camera to take photos.

The last punishment, and a personal favorite of mine, is what many refer to as the “food punishment.” In this punishment, the loser of the league has to go to an establishment such as IHOP or The Waffle House and they have to stay there for 24 hours. The only way to reduce the amount of time is to eat a waffle or pancake. For every waffle or pancake they eat, an hour is taken off their time. This presents the loser with a daunting challenge: do they sit bored waiting for the day to end, or do they stuff themselves with food to make the punishment end sooner? Either way, they aren’t allowed to leave their table or go to the bathroom until their time is up.

Overall, Fantasy Football is a great way to have fun with friends, but without the Milk Miles, Social Media Takeovers, SATs, Rides to Nowhere, and Food Punishments, Fantasy Football wouldn't be half as fun.

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